Some people have way too much time on their hands, but sometimes I’m glad when these people are able to do awesome things like figuring out the optimal pack efficiently of urinal traffic.

“And, of course, if you want to make things really awkward, I suggest printing out this article and trying to explain it to the guy peeing next to you.”

Slate takes a look at the physics of time travel and comes up with the following rules:

1) There are no "parallel universes"
2) You can't visit any time before your time machine was built.
3) You can't kill your own grandfather.
4) You can't actually do anything in the past to affect the future.

From BoingBoing: "Chris Matt shows you how to read faster. The trick, he says, is to repeatedly say "AEIOU" or "one, two, three, four," as you read. This prevents you from vocalizing the written words with your larynx..."

From Esquire: "How a Japanese spy taught men how to pleasure the urethra, G-spot, clioris, and clitoral network all at once"

Score!

From Esquire: "You're born with them, spend a lifetime acquiring them, and check them at the door on your way out — and for what? To survive in the wild? To get rich and retire early? No. You acquire skills so you can be a man of action..."

From Boing Boing: "Writing in next month's Wired, Joshua Davis presents a superb feature -- the first person account of Leonardo Notarbartolo, who was convicted of robbing the Antwerp Diamond Center vault of $100 million worth of inventory. Notarbartolo's story is colorful and fascinating -- and may even be true. It matches any heist flick for geekery and plot-twists:" (link to the full Wired article)

Finally, a cooking (and drinking) site I can endorse. Eat Drink or Die serves up simple to follow recipes with features like Drink of the Day (see below) and What’s for Dinner Tonight. They’re a little too focused on the healthy crap, but do a search for bacon and you can by pass that stuff.

Lots of studies by very smart/lazy people show that naps improve just about everything. Check out this guide by Boston.com to make sure your next nap is perfect.

This pains me to say, but even I think canned bacon looks gross and if that doesn’t make you sick, this insane German water slide should.

But more importantly, Esquire shows you how to pack the perfect cooler. Speaking of beer, Coors is stupid.

And finally, I wish my office had a beer pong team.

Here’s a bunch of resources to help you prank your way through April Fools 2008.

SpoofCard: Call your friends with any Caller ID number you want
Basically, this service allows you to spoof caller ID services by providing any number you want (think strip club to your best friend’s wife or IRS to your less than tax-paying buddy) to their caller ID. Hilarity ensues.

Fake Products at ThinkGeek
Almost every year, ThinkGeek.com comes out with a bunch of fake products. And almost all of them are so cool, they become real ones.

Toilet Cameras
The “Warning: Toilet cameras are for research purposes only” sticker is too funny!

Hijack a Fast Food Drive-Thru Speaker
“No and then!”

How to Make All of the Phones in Your Office Ring Simultaneously
Don’t call me when you get fired.