When politicians finally notice something going on around them the outcome is seldom positive. The recent brouhaha surrounding Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas is a prime example of how selective the people in charge are when it comes to decency in America.  While most people are familiar with the GTA issue (it was covered to death by every major media outlet in the world), there are hundreds of examples where questionable content is pushed to minors on television, in movies, in commercials, on the radio, etc, but for some reason, politicians have chosen video games as their battle front.

Politicians, the news media and activist groups were outraged by the sexually explicit content made recently available through hacks in San Andreas. This forced Rockstar Games, the maker of the GTA series, to change the game’s rating to “Adults Only” (no one under 18) until the questionable content was removed.  The game already had a “Mature” (no one under 17) rating for its gratuitous use of profanity, violence and sexual innuendos.  It wasn’t until actual nudity appeared that it hit the Clinton radar.  Apparently, it’s ok to kill cops, light houses on fire, steal cars, hire hookers, beat people to death with sex toys, (I could go on), but showing (animated) sexual intercourse is horribly wrong.

The government has traditionally been very conservative when it comes to sex in video games and oddly lax with violence.  Both types of games have been around since the beginning, but with the advance of graphic processing and realism, sex has become more of an issue with politicians.  An odd choice since enhanced graphics in violent video games often leads to much more graphic death scenes (beheadings, exploding people, chainsaw massacres) but sex scenes rarely go beyond a nude woman and insinuated sex acts (ala HBO).

Video games are under a political microscope while other forms of media parade sexual content around like a dancing monkey.  Today’s cable networks (not that I’m complaining) continue to pump out (and fiercely promote) shows like The Real World, Howard Stern, and anything on E! which are full of underage drinkers, naked tickle fights and buxom bikini babes. The same things if found in video games give politicians migraines.

I once thought conservative politicians fought sex on every front, but now I know they are biased toward video games.  When Janet’s “costume malfunction” brought the FCC’s fury down on mainstream media, it was a mere blip on the censorship radar. With video games, every “mature” title is scrutinized beyond recognition if it even hints toward nudity or sexual situations.  Titles like BMX XXX, Dead or Alive Beach Volleyball, The Playboy Mansion, and even the Sims draw more negative attention than any similar television program.

Why are politicians so concerned about video games?  Because they don’t understand them.  They still perceive video games as children’s toys, which is odd because of the high ticket price to obtain them.  A kid can walk into any 7/11 and potentially buy serious XXX smut from behind the counter for less than $8, but video games (and the hardware to play them on) are considerably more than the average paperboy makes in a week. Television is free (for the most part) and the shows that air at 3pm on MTV (the Grind, Spring Break specials, and even regular music videos) are far more titillating than any video game I’ve ever played.  And now, with digital cable and “OnDemand” kids have a sea of “questionable” content at their finger tips 24/7.

Educating politicians is no small task, but they need to understand that video games have come a long way since Pong.  The high cost alone prevents most kids from purchasing games themselves, putting more power in parents’ hands to filter what their children can and cannot play.  According to the Entertainment Software Association (ESA), the average game buyer is 37 years old (average video game player is 30 years old) and 95 percent of computer game buyers were over the age of 18.

With the obvious gap between political understanding and what is actually going on in the video game market it’s imperative that associations like the ESA and the ESRB do thier part to move the industry forward. Adults are buying and playing video games in mass and, if the market exists, have access to adult orientated content in video games.

Odds are there is a minor league baseball team within 30 minutes of your home and while the major league club of most cities is the top dog, there’s plenty of room for the little guys.  I’m a Red Sox fan, but outrageously priced tickets, food, beer, parking, etc, often keep me away from Fenway.  Compared to the Bigs, minor league teams offer affordable (and enjoyable) alternatives featuring rising stars (and in some cases, returning “legends“) playing top notch baseball.

I recently ventured to a Brockton Rox game in southeastern Massachusetts.  Owned by Bill Murray, the team won their championship last year and is making a solid run (6-1) at this year’s title.  The stadium is like new and the $5 seats I had where still close enough to hear the 1st base umpire’s lousy calls.  Parking is free or very cheap and often goes to a local charity.  Food was reasonably priced and 20oz beers were only $3.50.  All-in-all, it was a great experience and I plan to get out to a few more games this season.

Have you ever felt like you just weren’t getting your egg & muffin sandwiches fast enough?  Worry no more with Back to Basic’s latest offering, the Egg & Muffin Toaster.  Available in September, this device toasts your choice of bread, cooks an egg and even warms pre-cooked breakfast meats all at the same time.  I know what will be on my Christmas wish list this year.

An epic advance in beer pouring technology is brewing in Chicago IL.  Laminar Technologies, makers of the astounding TurboTap might change forever the way you get sauced at pubs.  The TurboTap pours beer fast and efficiently, allowing for quicker turn-around on your beer order.

If you don’t believe me watch this video of the TurboTap pouring Guiness (you might want to sit down).  There’s nothing I hate more when I’m thirsty than a slow pouring beer.  The TurboTap all but eliminates this issue and should allow bars and restaraunts to mass-pour beers, increasing the happiness of their patrons and the wallets of their owners.  All they need now is a list of bars that offer the TurboTap and I’ll never be sober again.

Boston’s own Fidelity Investments is currently under investigation by the SEC for questionable gift and expense reporting including a $10,000 yacht rental, $75,000 in private jet rentals and at least $1000 to rent a dwarf.  And all of these expenses occured over the same weekend for an employee’s bachelor party!

According to a new study by Lifetime (a little biased maybe?), wives are more likely to purchase and use a Tivo than the man of the house.  Hmmm, I wonder if it anything to do with the percentage of TV women generally watch vs. men.  I know this is true in my house given the large volume of Soaps and Oprah episodes stored on my Tivo(s), but if it weren’t for sports and HBO I would never watch TV.

Hotel room: $200/night, game tickets: $18-27/ea, time in the car: 8+ hours each way, a weekend trip to Baltimore to see a mid-season pennant race between the Red Sox and Orioles at Camden Yards: priceless.

Everyone I’ve ever talked to that’s been to Oriole Park at Camden Yards has told me that the place is gorgeous and will quickly leave you envious when comparing our dear, antiquated Fenway.  And after spending 2 games in the confines of the Orioles’ stadium, I can see why people feel this way, but I wouldn’t trade Fenway for it.  Here’s a short list comparing the various stadium amenities of each park.

Beer – Arguably the most important ingredient in watching a baseball game. People complain about the price of beer at Fenway, but the cost was comparable at Camden.  Although, Camden gets the nod for allowing beer vendors to peddle plastic bottles of beer directly to your seat.  Advantage: Camden Yards

Seating – Seating at baseball games is a lot like seating in a car… if you sit in it long enough, they’ll become uncomfortable no matter how nice they are.  While Camden definitely has some great views and angles in Fenway seats can often be “obstructed,” Fenway’s unique seating options (Green Monster, right field roof, center field bleachers) has the old park competing.  Advantage: Tie

Food – Regardless of the fact that Camden ran out of hot dogs on Friday night (and water on Saturday!) there is no comparing the meat substance known as the Fenway Frank.  Advantage: Fenway Park

Atmosphere – Fenway has sold out every game for the last 3 years and even though it can only hold 36,000 people, Boston fans are by far the most dedicated nuts in the country.  Oriole Park can hold about 10,000 more souls, but they lack the enthusiasm for the game evident in a trip to Fenway.  Regardless of this, I’d guess that Boston fans outnumbered home towners 5 to 1 during the Sox visit.  Advantage: Fenway Park

Ticket Pricing – Single game tickets for a game at Fenway retail from $12 to $100 compared to $8 – $45 in Camden.  However, you couldn’t touch a Sox ticket in Boston for less than 100% above cover price for any regular season home game, 200%+ for a Sox/Yankees bloodfest and your first born for a playoff game.  Advantage: Camden Yards

Design – Camden is a beautiful new ball park that diverges from the cookie-cutter design notorious of recent MLB stadiums.  Fenway is as unique as they come.  The Green Monster, Yawkee Way, Pesky’s Pole should all be official historic sites (and probably will be someday).  While many people complain about Fenway’s outdated amenities, it’s obvious they hold a special place in every Sox fan’s heart.  Advantage: Fenway

With a close (and very biased) score, Fenway wins 3.5 to 2.5.  I’d love to get a big shiny new stadium like Oriole Park in Boston for the Sox to romp in, but not at the expense of losing Fenway.  If we get a new park, they need to figure out a way to save the Monster, Pesky’s Pole and the $35 Coors Light cups.

A new survey done by Salary.com and AOL shows that the typical American worker wastes over 2 hours a day at work.  Over 44% of that time is surfing the Internet. I’m surprised that bathroom breaks and strip club runs didn’t make the list, since that’s where most of my day goes.  I wonder if this post counts toward Internet surfing or Other?

The New York Mets have signed a Dominican 16 year-old to a $1.4 million contract two years before he can legally play in the U.S.  The contract includes a $100,000 bonus to pay for college, meaning the Mets might not see this guy in action until 2011.  I’m all for player scouting and development, but a contract this large for such a young kid could only spell trouble.

The Yankees drafted Brien Taylor, an 18 year-old with their first pick in 1991 (ahead of guys like Manny Ramirez (13), Cliff Floyd (14) and Aaron Sele (23)), offered him $1 million and he got hurt in a bar fight before ever pithing in the Majors.

Baseball is a lucrative business and the Mets have to think that if they didn’t sign him, someone else would, but this is going too far.  Baseball needs to step in and regulate this before we have scouts watching tee-ball leagues for the next big talent.  A 16 year-old phenom has enough distractions in his life, he doesn’t need big league clubs offering him outrageous contracts before he can even drive a car.

Another great column from Bill Simmons asks, “Has Anyone Seen The Boss?” where Simmons plots out the demise of Yankees owner George Steinbrenner since August 2004.  It’s a long read but worth it.